If I just came out with it right now, you’d either not believe me, or you’d have too much understanding all at once and you wouldn’t understand the hidden dangers. I had to put asterisks instead of the actual letters because I’ve got to be careful how I tell you this. But the truth is number seven is quite a big deal. Though you can’t have enough secrets in one chapter, you know. Crumb’s exceptional Warmpaws, which is by far the best of its type.)Īlso, you might be wondering what *****-******* ***-*** ************* actually is. (Although, if you want to read a book about radiator-detecting felines, I highly recommend A. This seventh power is the most important one, at least for the tale I am about to tell you. Indeed, the list is so long that it would fill ten whole books the size of this one, and your eyes would be bleeding by the time you got to 9,080,652: “radiator radar.”īut number seven is a good place to stop. And don’t get me wrong, this is by no means the end of the list. But if you see magic often enough it starts to look normal.

You might know cats do some of these things, even if you’ve never understood it as magic before. Such as:ġ. The ability to understand a thousand different animal languages (including gerbil, antelope, and the ridiculously complicated goldfish).ģ. The capability of napping anywhere-laps, kitchen floors, on top of TVs when the theme song to the news is blaring at full volume.Ĥ. Smelling sardines from two miles away.Ħ. The ability, via their whiskers, to sense approaching dogs. So yes, every cat who ever prowled the earth is capable of doing some very special things. And some of the things we imagine are more true than the facts we learn in math, it’s just a different kind of truth to 76 - 15 = 61. They are things stored in all our imaginations-hence the name stories-and it is the author’s job to point them out. And now you’re thinking, These are just words in a story written by some author with a boring name, and all authors aren’t to be trusted one bit, because they tell lies for a living.īut stories aren’t always lies. To which I would say-that’s just what they want you to think. You’re thinking, No, they don’t, cats are just cute little pets who sleep next to radiators all day long. They have powers you and I can only dream of having.īut even as I tell you this I can see what you are thinking. Okay, sit down, get ready, brace yourself, have some emergency chocolate handy. Here is a secret I shouldn’t really tell you, but I will because I just can’t help it.

To be a cat by matt haig